As you well know, I’m quite the strap-on aficionado, so I was really interested in trying out the Bend Over Beginner kit. It comes with (almost) everything you need for strap-on sex, and the pieces are quality, too:
The only possible addition, or improvement, I could suggest, would be to include a good anal sex book, or DVD. And maybe a small bottle of water-based lube. Still, this is a pretty comprehensive collection of items to have if, as the name of the product suggests, you’re a strap-on sex beginner.
I’m going to go through the parts of the kit one by one. Also, since the name of this product is the “Bend Over” kit, and the dildos are on the smaller side, I’m assuming this product is intended for anal sex, though I’m sure you could use it vaginally as well:
Tantus Silk Small
Upon looking at this dildo, I knew it wasn’t going to do much for me. In both my pussy and my ass, it just felt like a finger. I don’t really see the point in spending money on a Silk Small when using my own fingers would have a similar effect. The one male partner I tried this with wasn’t impressed, and said he could take more, even though I was one of the first people he’d tried anal play with.
On the plus side? The Silk Small is perfect for people who haven’t had much anal experience, but crave the intimacy and intensity of being fucked by a strapped-on partner as opposed to being fingered. I could have seen myself using this on the Optimist, who loved having his butt played with, but was already overwhelmed even when I was only using two of my fingers on him. The Silk Small is, obviously, harness-compatible, is longer than my fingers and has a nice curve, so is probably perfect for seeking out a G-spot/prostate.
Tantus Silk Medium
The Silk Medium was more satisfactory. As it’s thicker, I liked it in my ass a lot better, and actually liked using it in my pussy quite a bit, which was surprising due to it’s small size. Again, the curve was key.
Overall, these two dildos are probably an excellent choice for someone with little to no experience with anal play. The dildos are smooth, simple, uncomplicated, and small. When I first experimented with anal sex, I was very interested and excited, but also pretty nervous. I don’t see either of these dildos being intimidating to someone who might be a little nervous and insecure about trying something new.
To sterilize the Silks, you can wash them with 10% bleach solution, put them in the top shelf of the dishwasher with no soap, or boil them for at least 5 minutes. Also, silicone toys are not compatible with silicone lubes.
Here are the Silks next to my go-to anal dildo, the Tantus Acute:
Sportsheets Vibrating Velvet Harness
The harness, like the dildos, is also very straightforward and easy to use. It has double-straps (that go under your butt as opposed to being worn like underwear) made of nylon, and remind me of backpack straps. You also adjust them the same way you would backpack straps. Very easy. You can also wash the entire thing by throwing it in the laundry. The first harness I ever owned was the Aslan Jaguar, and while it’s gorgeous, I wasn’t quite sure how to take care of the leather. The Velvet Harness is definitely lower maintenance.
In addition to being easy to use, the harness is pretty versatile. It has a pocket where you can insert a bullet vibe (I opted to insert the Lelo Mia, which fit pretty well, except for the base protruding out of it). You can swap out different sized O-rings with four snap closures on the front of the harness. The harness can also fit people whose hips are up to 50″. If you’re a smaller person, like me, and don’t like the straps trailing behind you, you can always trim them and use a lighter to melt the edges and prevent them from fraying.
Personally, I don’t really like the harness that much because it’s a little bulky, and doesn’t fit my body as seamlessly as the other harnesses I own. Ideally, when I wear a harness, I want to feel like it #1 isn’t there, or #2 is an extension of my body. I don’t feel like that when I wear the Velvet harness; this harness feels like I’m strapping on a piece of material, that is sitting conspicuously on top of my cunt, and acting as the base for a dildo. I also don’t feel very connected to my cock anymore, since the triangular piece of velvety material is quite thick. Finally, I don’t find the fuzzy material particularly sensual. I got the purple set, but I think the kit also comes in black. I would’ve liked that color better than the bright purple, too.
So that’s the Bend Over Beginner kit. I ended up giving all the pieces of this kit away, since none of them really worked for me. However, I’m glad this kit exists and I see it being a good purchase for someone who’s just beginning to explore the awesome spectrum of anal play.